No One Wants to Play School with Me!

It's getting to be that time of year. We've reached the last few weeks of school and final tests are being administered, projects are being submitted, and end-of-the-year paperwork needs to be organized. This past week was REALLY overwhelming with all those responsibilities on top of every day life that just refuses to take a break during the busy times. I had several days where I thought, "If I could just have another couple sets of hands, I could get all of this done so quickly!"

At home, this would be the time of year that I would put out a call to see if I could sucker any friends into playing Teacher for a day. There's always at least one. People who don't teach think it's so much fun to grade tests! Rifling through filing cabinets and throwing out old worksheets or dusting off classroom bookshelves seems to be like a fun session of make-believe for those who don't have to do it every day. And I willingly gave my friends the opportunity to hearken back to the old days of pretend at our dining room tables when we used to drill our stuffed animals on the i-before-e rule. (Admit it. We all did it.)

But HERE! Here all my friends ARE teachers! They all have their own classrooms to organize, tests to grade. It's a real jerk move for me to whine and say, "I have so much to do, would you mind helping me grade these tests really quickly?"

Ain't nobody got time for that!

I guess this is one teensy weensy downside to living overseas in a teacher expat community.

Vicariously yours,

So much money and time on their hands, it's dangerous

I worked at an low-income urban public school in Nashville. I didn't realize it at the time, but I absolutely loved it. I miss working in MNPS (words I NEVER thought I'd say) the longer we are away. Working in this VERY high income, for-profit, private international schools has been a little bit of a shock to my system.

I sound like I don't enjoy my international students, but I do. They have their own unique charms, just like my kids back home did. But I think the most shocking part of working with such affluence is the crap these kids bring to school!

The other day I confiscated a laser pointer. Classic goods in a middle school. But this is like an industrial strength, retina damaging kind of laser pointer. It hurts looking at the little dot as we giggle at our Kitty frantically running around the house chasing her newest green foe.

If you look closely, you can actually SEE the laser beam!

WHAT DOES A MIDDLE SCHOOLER NEED WITH A LASER POINTER THIS STRONG?!

What does ANYBODY need with a laser pointer this strong outside of military service!? This laser could seriously cause some damage. To see how strong it was, the Mister shined the laser through our window and across the highway AND WE COULD STILL SEE THE LASER DOT! The kid I took it from was flabbergasted when I told him he wasn't getting it back till the end of the school year. But I'm sure I'll probably see him with another one later next week. Because that's been the common theme among our students here in Kuwait: if they want it, they'll get it.

One of the more shocking desires that many of the kids at my current school have had indulged is the yearning for an exotic pet. Students have lions, cheetahs, and rare breeds that are smuggled in from who knows where. It's disgusting, and most of my kids are really confused as to why their crazy American teachers are so upset by their pet choices.

I shamelessly stole this from a colleague's facebook feed. It's  a cheetah that has been left in someone's car while they go in to a mall for an evening stroll, I'm sure.

What baby wants, baby gets.

Very different from my kids at home. But it certainly makes for some very entertaining times. Especially for the Kitty.



Vicariously yours,

Another airbnb success!

I think the house we stayed in on Koh Lanta in Thailand was one of the best finds we've experienced since we started using the website a few years ago.



Y'all. This house. was. AWESOME!

It was a pole house, which means most of the house was on stilts that went out into the water. When the tide was in, we could hear the little waves lapping up against the foundation. The living room and kitchen were open to the water, and we could open the windows on the side of the kitchen to get a great breeze. It was pretty darn steamy during the day, but we didn't mind! We just went out into the living room and enjoyed the sea breeze. Susanna, the owner, left us a set of speakers so we could listen to our music while we lounged.

Most of the time we were in the house, the tide was high, so we got a view like this one. This is the neighbor's longtail boat. I never saw it in use, so perhaps it was being used as a sort of floating storage unit?

This is what the pole houses look like at low tide. Not terribly beautiful, but low tide was mostly during the day while we were there, so we didn't get this view very often. When we tide was out, it did get hotter in the house, but in those cases, we simply retreated to the TV room, which had concrete walls, tile floors, and air conditioning. Perfect!

The only complaint I had about this house was the mosquitoes, but I am always bug bait, no matter where I go. Susanna provided us with some citronella coils that helped keep the biters away.

Thanks, airbnb!

Vicariously yours,

The Airline Spectrum of Service

You're going to make fun of me for writing about this as the first detailed post about spring break, but we spent a lot of time in transit on this trip, which means the airlines we experienced had a close correlation to how much we enjoyed those days.

So let me say this, fellow travellers: If you get the chance to fly Bangkok Airways, DO IT! We had great service from them on our domestic flights to and from Krabi and they have perfected the art of the layover.

We got to Bangkok and had a 4 hour wait before our next flight to Krabi International, so we checked in and found out that Bangkok Airways has a free lounge for ALL their passengers, not just the hoity-toity business class ones (there's a nicer, more exclusive one for the hoity-toities, don't worry)!! The lounge had comfortable chairs, including chaise lounges for those who wanted to nap.

and nap many of us did!

There was free food, and the best part: FREE UNLIMITED WIFI!  (which you can see the Mister and Matt enjoying in the second clip of the video on the previous post)

I thought this might only be a Bangkok airport-only thing, but NO! We got the same treatment at the Koh Samui airport (which is owned and operated by Bangkok Airways).

It's the kind of airport that doesn't have jetways to the terminal. Instead you have to ride this DisneyWorld-like tram thing to the terminal where you are greeted by THIS:

That's a gate waiting area

Y'all already know how much I loves me some DisneyWorld, so the tram ride alone would have been enough to win me over. But then I walked into this cabana haven and I was really sad that we only had a 30 minute stop-over to enjoy this beautiful airport!

On the other hand, we had the pleasure (used ironically) of flying to and from Kuwait on Sri Lankan airlines. Things started off humorous enough. Their flight safety video was one of the more entertaining ones I've seen. It was littered with computer animated characters that represented the many ethnic backgrounds of Sri Lankan's typical customers.

Yes, that was a grandmotherly lady stowing her Sri Lankan drums in the space under the seat in front of her. I was disappointed there wasn't actually someone like that on our flights.

But the flight attendants were not terribly attentive, one of them even decided for me that I would eat the chicken for dinner and that the Mister would have orange juice with his meal. The in-flight entertainment was lackluster, and on one flight the entire crew seemed to have been extremely upset to have to deal with any part of their jobs. All very small issues, I know. We arrived safely each time, with very little turbulence and the takes off and landings were smooth. But after having a taste of Bangkok Airways, I was really sad to have to fly back home on Sri Lankan and their grumpy attendants.

Vicariously yours,

Another country marked off the map!

Welp, we've made it back from a fantastic spring break trip to Thailand! Thailand is one of the go-to vacation spots for lots of ex-pats and I usually like to go to the lesser-traveled countries if I can. But I am so glad that we made this trip! The Mister and I traveled with our friend Matt who works in Kuwait with us. It was a great week of Three's Company-esque hijinks.

Before we went on the trip, I downloaded an app called One Second Everyday. I compiles one second of video from each day you make a recording and makes a fun little video of a period of time of your choosing. Thus, readers, I give you our spring break, in 15 seconds:



So fun, right?!

I'll elaborate more in future posts with photos and explanations of what all the fun that of those 1-seconds were a part. But for now I need to procrastinate all my responsibilities prepare for the last 7 weeks of school before summer break!

Vicariously yours,

Featured Photo: Grumpy Old Cat

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you don't leave your car window open in the Middle East.

Someone will set up shop. There are thousands of stray cats in this city, and they're all looking for a place to call their own. This little guy has claimed the back seat of this presumably abandoned car (perhaps it belongs to someone who lives in the apartment building in the background...all 4 tires are flat and the layer of dust suggests it hasn't moved in many many months) as his domain.

"Get off my lawn, you human!"

Vicariously yours,

Living in the Middle East changes you

There are many courtesies that Americans --especially those of us raised in the South-- pride ourselves on practicing daily. We hold doors, we give a friendly smile to strangers, and we throw up a quick thank you wave to anyone who lets us merge safely in traffic. But since moving to this region, I've picked up some habits that I never thought I would do.

It shouldn't come as a surprise. Moving to a foreign country means that you have to adjust to a new culture. But there are somethings that, when we first arrived on the scene, I said to myself, "I would NEVER do that!"

I lied.

Here are a few of the heinous habits I'm sad to say I preform regularly while I'm away from home.

1. Leaving the grocery cart in the middle of the parking lot.

None of these are my car. Nor my carts.

I HATE this with a fiery passion when I'm at home! How inconsiderate can you get, right?! Why is it so hard to wheel your cart to the corral and NOT leave it in a parking space? That just serves to piss everyone off when they try to pull into what looks like an empty space but in fact it is occupied by your rudeness. UGH!

But here... well...It's different. There are no corrals. Usually you have one of the bag boys (who are full grown immigrant men as opposed to high schoolers saving up to buy their first cars) help you to your car and he takes your cart back to the store for you. But sometimes you bag your own groceries, or the bag boy doesn't offer to help you to your car. And the parking lot is really far from the front door of the store...it's just...it's just really far...and...ok, I feel really lame trying to explain this. But EVERYBODY DOES IT, OK!? It's not just me.

This is where I left my cart.

Does it help that I always feel a little guilty as I walk away from my abandoned cart? And I always try to leave it with a group of other carts so it's easy for the poor guy who has to round them all up and wheel them back to the store...

Ok yes, I'm an awful person.

2. I tidy up on the day the cleaning lady comes.

I have a distinct memory from middle school of a lunchroom conversation with a classmate, Sara D., who was complaining about how her mom made her clean up her room before the maid came. "I mean, she's a maid. It's her JOB to clean up after me! Why should I clean up my room before she comes?!"

This memory stuck with me because my family never ever had a cleaning lady. We couldn't afford it. And this was the first time I realized I was probably in the minority of kids at my middle school who didn't have a maid. I also remember thinking it was odd that she, a middle school student, had someone clean her room for her. What else did she have to do with her time? Was her room so big that she couldn't handle the task on her own? I didn't want to be like that. How demeaning to make someone clean your room when you could just do it yourself.

Welp. I have become that person. Being a teacher, I never ever thought I would be able to afford a cleaning lady. When we lived in Saudi, my colleagues were horrified to hear that I didn't have a houseboy who would come and clean our 3 bedroom apartment. I was horrified that people DID that! It was just the two of us! We didn't even use two of the rooms!

Now we're in Kuwait and I don't think I'll ever be able to live without a cleaning lady again! Our apartment is even smaller than where we lived in Saudi, and our paycheck took a hit when we moved here, but LAWD having someone come by and clean up the kitchen and throw a load of laundry in the machine from time to time makes ALL the difference!

And you better believe that I do a quick run-through before work on the mornings the our cleaning lady comes! haha! My apologies to 13-year-old Sara D. for judging her all those years ago.

3. Honk.

In the South, we honk our horns all the time. There's the "Hello" honk and the "Oh God! Look out you're going to hit me/someone!" honk. Those are the only two acceptable reasons to use your car horn at home. The Mister and I adhere to those guidelines strictly. I'd go so far as to say that I've only used my car horn maybe a total of 5 times in my life.

...until I moved to Kuwait. Honking your car horn is like a sport here. I've already analyzed the intricacies of the honking in Saudi Arabia, but I think it's safe to say the car horn is abused even more here in Kuwait. And I'm among the abusers.

To be fair, I only honk when someone cuts me off (which is always), when I'm almost involved in a horrific collision (which happens more often than our mothers would like me to admit), or when a stray cat/pigeon/feral child is meandering slowly across the road (seriously, why wouldn't they put a little more pep in their step?!). In such instances, I lay on the horn heavier than an angry New Yorker during rush hour.

I'm almost ashamed to admit that I get a teeny tiny bit of pleasure from it.


Thankfully, the Mister and I are able to switch these behaviors off when we are home during the summer. The rudeness and the road rage go into their little cerebral compartments until we return again to the land of sand.

Vicariously yours,