The Mashallah decal: the Jesus fish of Saudi Arabia

You know how when you're not looking for something, you see it all the time? But once you try to catch evidence of this thing, it seems to disappear? I had that kind of situation with the photos in this blog post. For the past couple weeks, I've been trying to catch the Mashallah decal in a parking lot so I could get a decent shot, but I could never find one. Of course I saw a billion of them while riding down the road, so forgive me for the crappy out-the-car-window-with-the-camera-on-my-phone photos in this post.

Islam teaches a belief in the Evil Eye. Muslims believe that the Evil Eye is the cause behind some of the bad things that happen to people. For example, if you don't say "Mashallah" (pronounced mosh-allah) after giving a compliment, you might bring the Evil Eye upon the complimented person/item. Last year a colleague joked that she spilled soup on her top because another colleague complimented her on the shirt but didn't say "Mashallah" afterward.

Mashallah essentially gives props to God (Allah) for providing the item that is being complimented, and kind of tells the Evil Eye to stay away from God's handiwork. It also helps the person you're complimenting to know that the kind words come from a good intention, not out of jealousy.

I've mentioned the Mashallah before, but I haven't mentioned how much we see it every day. Somebody has made a fantastically successful business out of printing Mashallah decals for the cars of Saudi Arabia. It was explained to me by one friend that people put Mashallah on their cars to protect their car, their driving, and their passengers from the Evil Eye. This results in fantastic irony when you see a Mashallah car in a 3 car rear-ender pile-up on the highway.

Another acquaintance explained that people put the Mashallah on their car to "Show off what a good Muslim they are." The jury's still out as to which explanation is more valid.

Anyway, I say all this to tell you the conclusion I reached the other day: The Mashallah sticker is the Jesus fish of Saudi Arabia.

Perhaps it's because I was raised in the American South, but I think most of us can agree that one sees a plethora of ichthuses when driving down the roads of suburbia in the States.

They come in all kinds of shapes and sizes, and sometimes in little fishy pods, I assume to represent each member of the family that owns the car.

Or apparently the whole family tree!

I've never been much of a Jesus fish kinda Christian. I always thought it was your walk, not your driving that showed the world your beliefs. Plus I knew that all it took was one accidental run of a red light or speeding ticket being issued on the side of a busy highway for a person to say, "All those Christians are so hypocritical." I couldn't take the pressure. 

Just like the Jesus fish and its many designs, the Mashallah decal has several variations for the discerning Muslim driver. Here are a few of the more popular ones.

The teardrop Mashallah 

This decal is every.where here! Maybe because of its appealing, calligraphic design, or maybe because it is compact yet artistic, the teardrop Mashallah is definitely the front runner in this race of the religiously zealous. 

The Comic Sans Mashallah

Can you believe my luck!? I spotted two of the most popular Mashallah decals right next to each other at the same red light! The Comic Sans Mashallah seems to say "I'm hip and fun, but I'm also a faithful Muslim." Its spunky, carefree design is most frequently seen on the Honda Accords and Kia Ceratos of Arabia. There is one car we see almost every morning that has no less than 4 of these decals on its back bumper. That guy is extra safe from the Evil Eye.

The So Calligraphic You Just Have to Ask Someone What It Says Mashallah

I'll admit: I'm guilty of being that girl when we first moved here. Before the Mister and I moved into the apartment, we were living in a hotel and I rode to work each day with a female colleague, driven by a school driver. We were riding down the road and someone with this decal drove by. I asked my driver what the deal was, and got a 30 minute diatribe from my driver and my Muslim colleague. I mean I got the full explanation of what Mashallah meant (kind of...they kept trying to out Muslim each other. "Well actually it means..." then  "No, that's not right. Really, it means...") and then I got a lesson on how to read Arabic calligraphy and the haricat and intricacies of the Arabic alphabet.

You only make that mistake once.

The super calligraphic Mashallah seems to give the impression that the driver inside wants to prove his faith, but without all the trendy hype. This style of writing more resembles the writing you find in the Qur'an, without all the influence of pop culture and looking like one of those kids speeding down the highway in an Accord.

Any way you spin it, the Mashallah sticker is everywhere. I love that so much of Saudi Arabia is so similar to home, just with a different religion behind all the action.

Vicariously yours,

i have a come to Allah meeting

So, an interesting thing happened to me a few nights ago. I was invited to a panel discussion about the perception of Islam in non-Arab countries. The American teachers in the secondary school were invited to take part because...we're the only non-Arabs on staff. Since it seemed like something that would be a great experience for cross-cultural learning, those of us that were invited decided we would all go. They had also invited a couple of people from the Islamic Center in Dammam that were Filipino, I assume to try and get more than just the American view of Islam...you know, stress the non-Arab part of the function. It was going to be a very interesting night and I was actually pretty excited about the experience.

And it started off promisingly enough...a couple of teachers introduced the evening and welcomed everybody in, and then the mic was handed to one of the students. He addressed his first question to the Filipinos: "So how did you find out about Islam?" This is when we find out that the Filipino gentlemen were mostly new converts...from Christianity. One of them was a former priest and he proceeded to explain how he realized that Christianity wasn't for him.

During the former priest's testimony (that really is the only way to describe it) I started to feel resentful. I resented the fact that I was basically tricked into an evangelistic pitch meeting. I resented that there was no mention of the perception of Islam in other countries, just the ways that Christianity is wrong. Don't get me wrong, they were all very friendly. They even offered to answer any questions we might have about Islam. They were talking to the room, of course...but looking straight at me.

I was put out. Annoyed. I considered walking out a couple of times. Not because I didn't like what they had to say, but because I felt like I had been lured there under false pretenses. I began to feel more and more defensive as the other speakers went on.

The father of one of my students came up to me after the "discussion" and gave me a pen with information about Islam on it. He called it a "magic pen"... you might say he was the Islamic equivalent of a Gideon. The pen had a scroll inside with websites with information about Islam.

Needless to say, I was upset by the time I got home. But I've thought a lot about it and I've come to a few conclusions.

First of all, this is literally the reason we came to Saudi Arabia. Not to convert to Islam, obviously, but to find out about other people's perspectives; to finally be in a minority and see what it feels like. I certainly was put in a position I'd really never been in before. So I can complain about it, or I can learn from it...and that is why we're here.

Second, this is no different than what would happen to anyone who's not a Christian back at home. Whether it's at work, school, or even in sports Christians take every opportunity they can to share their faith. From holiday programming to prayers before football games, Christianity is everywhere. Now that I've been on the other side of tracts, I can see how uncomfortable and even intrusive it can be. I'd never really thought about it until it was happening to me. Non-Christians are inundated with Christianity everyday in America, but in Saudi Arabia, the non-Muslims are inundated with Islam. I can actually sense your eyes rolling as I write this...but wait for the third point.

Third, and most importantly, I'm not at home. Saudi Arabia is a country that is ruled by sharia law and the king is the "custodian of the two holy mosques". You cannot separate Islam from Saudi. I don't think that expressing the religious views of the majority should be taboo. Just like Christians expressing their faith in America because they are in the majority. I live in an Islamic nation. I respect that.

In the end, I don't think that they set up the evening for the explicit purpose of converting the heathens. I think they really did want to talk about the issue of perception in non-Arab countries. I'm glad that I went. To hear the things that Muslims...especially Muslims that were once Christians...think about Christianity is fascinating. It's never a bad thing to get humbled every once in awhile. Ultimately, I'm not resentful about the experience...I actually think I learned from it.

Vicariously yours,

My funny co-workers

The biggest irony I find about my moving to Saudi Arabia is that I don't really work directly with that many Saudis during the day-- adults, I mean. 95% of my students are Saudis, but my co-workers in the English department are all Indian or Pakistani, so what I've learned about Saudi culture has been gleaned from conversations with my students and the Mister's co-workers.

Anyway, Saudi or not, the women I get to work with everyday are a real treat. It's such a fun mix of personalities and so far we all mesh really well.

Last week we all gathered at one house for a ladies' lunch and all-around fun time. There is one lady in particular who always inadvertently makes me laugh. I don't want to say she's spacey because she's very smart and organized, but I think she sometimes zones out and when she tunes back into a conversation, she hasn't quite gotten the whole story, so her comments are really random!

One such case happened at the ladies' lunch. It was time for the 4th prayer of the day, so she was suiting up and there was a discussion as to which direction Mecca was. All the ladies then took to pointing in one direction or another. The house we were in is located right behind the school, and since that's a place that they all pray in regularly, they used the school and its surrounding landmarks as directionals.

Right next door to the school is a Burger King, and as the crow flies, Mecca is in the same direction. So to help clarify the situation, one of the ladies said, "Yes, that's the direction because Burger King is that way."

To which my funny colleague gave a confused look and simply replied, "...we don't pray to Burger King!!"

It was so hilarious because she was so serious and couldn't understand why her friend had been praying to the fast-food-monarch all these years!

Just thought I'd share a funny story.

Vicariously yours,

You might like this version better...

Armed with my trusty flipcam and my hijab, I recorded tonight's call to prayer. It's a much better recording this time, and you can really hear how the call kind of sweeps across the city, mosque by mosque. I think it really this is pretty cool part of living in the "Magic Kindgom," as someone we met this weekend called it. I hope you enjoy.

*My apologies to Steven Spielberg for misspelling his name*

Vicarious yours,

Like a woman under cover...literally.

The Mister and I went to the Al Rashid mall today. We have a long weekend this week, and we knew that if we stayed in our hotel room for 3 days, only one of us would come out alive, so we decided to get out.

Saudi culture is very mall-centric. There are no movie theaters, no skating rinks. It's too hot to hang out at the beach during the day, and there's not a single putt-putt course to be found. So for entertainment, the people here shop. We decided to join them today.

As mentioned in a previous post, the call to prayer doesn't stop Saudis from enjoying their mall time. They just blast the call over the P.A. system, and everything comes to a halt for about 20 minutes. We were in the mall today when the 4 o'clock prayers were to begin, so I whipped out my camera and got some footage.

We tried to be sneaky about it because people don't like to have their pictures taken here (not entirely sure why yet...will continue to investigate), so we didn't want to attract too much attention by video taping everything we saw.

As a result, you get a great view of the ceiling of the mall...and of my nostrils. Sorry in advance.

Enjoy!

Vicariously yours,

Insh'allah: The "bless her heart" of Saudi Arabia

Every culture has its little phrases that are unique. In the South, we all know that when one says, "Bless her heart," or "God love 'im" it's not really a compliment, or a blessing.

For those who have been living under a rock for that past 9 years, Saudi Arabia is an Islamic country, and that means most of their colloquialisms involve that religion in some way. The most frequently heard phrase is "Insh'allah."

Directly translated, it means "If God wishes it." But just like "Bless her heart," I've come to find that Insh'allah can also have another meaning: "But don't bet on it."

For example: Our school hasn't yet gotten it's cargo shipment of school supplies from the US. This means that I haven't gotten a stapler, tape (masking or scotch), paper, pens, pencils, or any sort of school supply you would expect to be on hand in a school. While this would normally mean I just needed to pop into the nearest Office Max and stock up, the Hubsy and I are currently dependent on a hired driver to get around town, so errands are exponentially more difficult.

When I asked last Wednesday when the supplies would come in, I was told, "They will be here on Saturday or Sunday, insh'allah."

Guess what hadn't arrived by Saturday or Sunday.

Here are a few examples of insh'allah in action:

"When will I get a copy of my class schedule?"

"You'll have it before the students arrive, insh'allah."

"Can we meet to talk about my discipline plan?"

"Yes, I will come to your room in 5 minutes, insh'allah."

"ALL the bathrooms are being renovated at the same time?! Will they be finished by the time school starts?"

"Insh'allah."

"Don't worry, the meeting will only last a few minutes, insh'allah."

"You will be moved out of the hotel and into your apartment by September 22, insh'allah."

And one for which I hope insh'allah REALLY means insh'allah:

"This will be a successful and great school year, insh'allah."

Vicariously yours,

My first Mutawa

So I went to the mall last night to buy my abaya.

Now when I say "mall" in America, I think we all generally get the mental picture of a two leveled, large-ish building with a food court and maybe a carousel (unless, of course you live in Minnesota).

Seriously, the mall I went to last night makes any mall (even the mall of America) look pathetic. Yes, I've been to the Mall of America and I realize it has an amusement park in the middle of it.

This one did too...and an ice skating rink, and two food courts and it had two airport concourse-wide main aisles with stores on both sides. It. was. huge.

I was so completely blown away by the enormous size of this building, and then I looked at the stores. They're all American. Gap, Hollister, Zara, Mark Spencer, and every possible other kind of store you could ever want.

The most striking image from last night was seeing a Starbucks, and looking at the patrons and they're all in niqabs and thobes. It was such a funny juxtaposition. I wish I could have taken a picture (btw: you'll pretty much only see photos of me and the Mister, the other American teachers and landscapes. Saudi people are "kind of sensitive" about having their pictures taken, according to my new boss).

In addition to my first Saudi mall experience and my first abaya purchase, I had my first Mutawa sighting!

For those who don't know, the mutawa are the religious police in Saudi Arabia. They're essentially like the detention hall monitors. They make sure the women are covered and everyone's following the correct Muslim code. They're famously described in newspapers as the men who go around spray painting women's uncovered toes and hounding couples if they're not supposed to be out alone together.

So here's how it went down.:

It was sundown, so they broadcasted the call to prayer throughout the mall (totally bizarre. You hear the bing boom of a typical P.A. system and then out comes this booming chant, "Allllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh akbar." Very surreal), and all the stores have to close and theoretically everyone's supposed to stop what they're doing and pray. They didn't. Apparently the sundown prayers are kind of do-them-when-you-can-as-long-as-it's-before-you-go-to-bed. So everyone leaves the stores and just sits on the benches and waits.

Well I was with my new boss and she said we should just take the opportunity to window shop and then we could pick out a store to go into once prayers were over. So while we're getting lost in this monstrosity of a mall, a very nice woman in a niqab and abaya stops us and says, "You should know there are mutawa here and if they see her walking around like that [referring to me who was sans covering], she is going to get in trouble and I don't want you to have to get in trouble."

It was so nice of her! She was just looking out for me, and I was grateful for the heads up. So my new boss just says, "Well we're here for the purpose of buying her an abaya, so if they stop us we'll just tell them that," and then we turned to walk away.

Not 20 steps later, my boss goes, "And of course there's one of them walking with a police officer."

I just played it cool, didn't make eye contact and walked with a purpose. He didn't say anything to me, but he did look me up and down. I wasn't scared. I asked my boss what he could have done if he did stop me, and she just said he would make a fuss and that's it. I could tell that she, like most Saudi women, aren't thrilled with having to worry about mutawa in the first place.

I asked her how you can tell if a man is one of the mutawa or not.

"Short thobe, long beard."

Vicariously yours,