Red?

This has been the longest first week back to school EVER. Tomorrow is the last day of the work week and that has kind of snuck up on me, but Saturday (our first day of the work week) feels like it was years ago. ...if that makes any sense.

I was sitting here reflecting on my week so far, and there have been many instances that my students have made me double over in laughter. I must say, as frustrating as my job can be, I genuinely enjoy my students. They challenge my skills as a teacher in a good way. They are pretty awesome human beings. And some of them really want to learn, not just get the grade they want.

In my 8th grade class, I've started a drama unit, and I've rocked their literary worlds. They legitimately did not realize that drama was a genre, not just something bitter teenage girls cause in your life when they're pms-ing. So it's been a fun week of introducing them to a new part of my language.

Anyway, for a review game today, I took a cue from "Whose Line is It Anyway?" and had the kids in teams of 4-5. The teams were given a review question and they had to answer it as a team, but they couldn't talk to each other, and only one person could say one word at a time. So they had to band together and work individually at the same time. It is a review game, but it's also just a game to get the class laughing. Research has shown that people retain information when they've associated it with a happy memory, so the more you laugh at school the more you learn.

ANYWAY. I knew this was going to be a challenging game for my girls to begin with because English is their second language, but I knew they'd have fun just the same. I gave the first team their question:

Me: Team one: What are stage directions?

Student 1: [blank stare]

Teammates: Yallah! (hurry up! come on!)

Student 1: [blank stare]

Teammate: Just say a word!

Student 1: Red?

The entire class burst into laughter. Stage directions are not, in fact, red. But that sure did make for an entertaining answer.

It was the next team's turn, so after they had lined themselves up according to height (their idea, not mine), they were ready for their first question.

Me: Team two, what is a line? ...and I mean a line in drama, not a line at the bathroom.

By now everyone had a rough idea of how the game worked, so they dove right in to their answer. It was hilarious because each of them had an answer in their heads, but all of their answers were slightly different. So when person one said, "A," her teammate said, "No! The first word is 'Lines!'"

One: It is?

Two: Yes! "Lines are..."

One: Oh. Lines are... [looks at two with a confused expression]

Two: No! you're just supposed to say one word! You say "Lines," and I say, "Are!"

One: Oh.

Me: It really doesn't matter how she starts the sentence. The point is you're supposed to think on your feet, but let's just go with it. One, you said "Lines." So Two says "Are...."

And they picked it up from there. They muddled through a sentence and when they had answered the question the class nodded in agreement and we thought they were finished.

Three: Because

Teammates: [confused looks]

I was wondering what more she could add to the answer "Lines are the words the actors say in a play." But they started rambling on and on. I think rainbows were mentioned, and ice cream...Eventually, One stopped the run away train...

Three: happy

Four: moments

One: period.

We were all in stitches because the expression on One's face was one of desperation. English is definitely not her forte and she wanted off this crazy ride. She laughed at herself along with the rest of the class. With an exasperated, "Khalass!" (quit it! or I'm over this!) she declared that her team's turn was over and sat back down.

I think it goes without saying that I'll definitely be planning more improv games in our dramatic future.

Vicariously yours,

It's not all camels and oppression...

A lot of my posts about Saudi Arabia have had a bit of a negative spin, and I want to clarify. I really am not miserable here at all. A lot of the things people think they know about this Kingdom are total misconceptions, and it's been great to prove all of those misunderstandings false.

There are a few things that I really do enjoy about living in Saudi Arabia. For example:

The abaya and hijab. As much as the West likes to disparage the uniform of Saudi women, I really don't mind it much at all. Because I'm covered from head to toe, it doesn't matter what I'm wearing when I leave the house to run errands. I went grocery shopping today in my pajamas. And because it's silly for me to suit up to run out to the street, I get out of taking out the trash. I don't have to worry about how my hair looks, and a lot of the time I don't even worry about putting on make up. Plus, because Western women aren't *really* required to wear the hijab, I score bonus points with my Saudi colleagues for wearing it when I don't have to.

There is no such thing as cold weather. Yes, my students are starting to wear sweatshirts to school in the morning because they get a chill from the 70 degree weather we're having. But it's like heaven for me! The hubs and I have slept with the window open for the past few weeks, and there's no end in sight for that luxury. Even though I miss the bon fires and s'mores of the fall season back home, I do NOT miss the winter jackets and cold bathroom floors. I am definitely going to love winter in Saudi Arabia.

Fresh produce is VERY cheap here. Because there's always a temperate zone just a few hours away, produce is ridiculously cheap. I might not be able to find all of the fruits and vegetables that I'm used to, but I can find some very interesting and exotic fruits for just a few cents per pound. I bought a bunch of bananas for about a dollar a pound! Apples are about 50 cents a pound. There are bundles of carrots, peppers, cucumbers and other fruits for crazy low prices! I'm really really hoping that this fact will up the amount of healthy foods I add to my diet. I'll keep you posted on how that research goes.

I'm treated with slightly more respect here. I've been happily surprised by this, because it is one of the most popular misconceptions of the Kingdom. Before leaving home, I was told countless times that I would have to walk 10 paces behind my husband and he would have to do all the talking. That has just not been the case. When the Mister and I were in Dubai, I was expecting to feel just like I was at home. But whenever we went to a store or restaurant or anywhere that I would need to speak to a man, I was treated like I wasn't even there. Some men even refused to look at me at all. I would ask a question, and he would turn to my husband and say, "Yes sir, how can I help you?" I have not had that experience at all in Saudi Arabia. There have been a few times that I've seen the Muslim man have an internal conflict as to whether it is ok for him to speak to another man's wife. But I guess because we get to play the Western card, he generally gets over that and treats me like a grown adult.

One word: Shawarma. Unfortunately, this is probably going to be the biggest factor that prevents me from incorporating more fresh produce into my daily diet. Shawarma is what we would call gyros back at home. You've seen the giant slab of seasoned meat rotating by a glorified warming lamp, and then shaved from its rotisserie to be wrapped up in a warm pita with various accouterments. But boy oh boy you have never had such wonderful shawarma in your entire life as the shawarma you find in Saudi Arabia. Words cannot describe the yummy goodness and I'm not even upset that we had to come half way across the world to find it. Too bad I can't share with all you suckas!

Electronics are plentiful, and ridiculously cheap to get repaired. About a month ago, I killed our brand new laptop by spilling water on it as I was using it as a recipe card for the dinner I was making (I also spilled the water down my arm, as is chronicled in this blog post). We've been dragging our feet with getting it fixed because we were sure it was going to cost a load of money and take forever to get repaired. Well, we took advantage of the time off from school and took the computer down to a repair place...ONE HOUR and $93 later, our computer is working just as good as new! There is no way that repair would have been so fast and so cheap at home! It costs more to get the Best Buy protection plan, and insurance would require a deductible of a lot more than $93 for sure!

The milk is a-mazingly good. I don't know what it is, but the milk here is so flavorful and good! I commented the other night to the Mister that if milk tasted like this when I was growing up, I would have bones that would rival Superman's!

So there it is, dear readers. This is just a short list of some of the things I enjoy most about living in Saudi Arabia. While some of them might not be so mind blowingly awesome to those of you back in the States, but it's the little things that make Kingdom life so worth it.

Vicariously yours,

Saudi Female Wardrobe: a tutorial

One of the first questions people asked me after they found out I was moving to Saudi Arabia was, "Are you going to have to wear the...you know...thing." Usually while pantomiming circles around their heads.

My answer was yes, and that generally elicited a few guffaws.

Most people back home just call the entire black get-up the "burka." But if you were to tell a woman who wears the hijab that you admire her burka, she's going to laugh at you and possibly get a little offended. Allow me to school you on the wardrobe of the Saudi woman.

This is a hijab (pronounced "hih-job"...or habab if you're my friend Kimmie)

(although Laura Bush is wearing it like a Kuwaiti in this picture. Saudis don't show any hair.)

In Saudi Arabia, 99% of the hijabs you see are black. Some will be mostly black with a little embroidery around the corners for decoration. You rarely see any other color as the dominate hue on the hijabs. I'm not sure why that is, because in other places in the Middle East, you see colorful fabrics and patterns.

Like this. I think this is perfectly lovely, but it's not acceptable in Saudi Arabia

The hijab shows your face, and depending on which region you're from, you can show a little hair. The looser your hijab is, the less conservative you are. If you're a Saudi woman, your hijab will be on and be on properly.

Some women don't wear the hijab. Note: when I say "wear the hijab" I mean all the time. ALL Muslim women in Saudi Arabia wear at least the hijab when they're out in public. But when a woman says she "wears the hijab," that means she wears it all the time, whether she is with women, men, or mixed company...for the most part. I work with a woman who "wears the hijab," but she doesn't wear it at school. However, if we take a photograph of her, she will stop us until she has put her hijab on. It's complicated, and I've not explained all the ins and outs, but I'll move on.

Most Saudi women also wear the niqab in addition to the hijab.

This is a niqab. (pronounced "nee-cob")

Note: I did not take any of the pictures posted. They were already on the internet, so I haven't invaded anyone's privacy.

What most people in the West would probably call the "burka" is actually the niqab. The niqab goes on top (or in front of, I guess) the hijab. It kind of looks like a bandana with a slit cut in it and straps attached so it can be tied to your head. So when the ladies are suiting up to leave school for the day, they put on their hijabs, and then tie the niqab on. Some will even put gloves on their hands as further coverage.

Generally, the wider the opening of your niqab, the less conservative a woman is, but let me be clear: women who wear the niqab are greatly respected here. I kind of equate it with a vegan among vegetarians. Vegetarians already live a different lifestyle. But when a vegetarian finds out a person is vegan, they often respond with, "Wow! How do you discipline yourself like that? I couldn't do it." That's how women are here. The women I have talked to who wear the niqab don't feel like it is demeaning or disparaging. They feel like it is their way to show their level of faith and to bring themselves closer to Allah.

This is the abaya (pronounced "uh-bye-uh")

This one is on a mannequin, obviously. It's the closest I could get to the typical abaya you see in KSA

The abaya is the black dress/robe/housecoat that most people assume covers from head to toe. Actually, the hijab combined with the abaya is what most people see. Generally, if a woman wears the abaya, she also wears the hijab, so it's hard to find one without the other.

Around here, though, you see a lot of women only wearing the abaya...but they are "Aramcons." Aramcons are the non-Muslim employees (or the wives of the employees) of Aramco, the Arab American oil company that is based in Dammam. In my experience, Aramcon women have almost a visceral aversion to the abaya and hijab. They seem to resent that they have to cover in this country, so they only do the bare minimum to escape the scrutiny of the mutawa. We often see Aramco women walking around the malls in just their abayas and their heads uncovered. Once I even saw two Aramco women walking completely uncovered!

Whenever the Mister and I go on the Aramco camp, the first thing I'm told when we meet up with our friends is, "You don't have to wear that thing here! Take it off!" Some don't seem to understand when I tell them that I really don't mind wearing it. It gets hot and stuffy sometimes, but it's not a big deal.

Anyway, Muslim women all wear the abaya here. As with the niqab, it seems the less frills and decoration, the more conservative you are. There are some very pretty abayas on the market. They have nice embroidery or cut is flattering. The expensive ones are made of really nice fabrics and they flutter and flow as the women walk past. I think it's quite ethereal.

I'll tell you more about the wardrobe of the women of Arabia in another post, including a video showing you how to tie to hijab. Until then, take a look at this video about why women cover themselves. I didn't find it terribly convincing, but it was interesting nonetheless.

Vicariously yours,

Say what now?!

We have some interesting characters in the house with us. Living upstairs, we have two lonely, single men. Well, lonely isn't the right word because it makes them sound desperate...but you can definitely tell that neither of them have seen or talked to an unmarried woman since he arrived in the country.

The other night, I mentioned to them that I had invited a co-worker of mine to dinner at the house. She had just arrived from Canada and I thought she would enjoy a little camaraderie.

"Really?" one of the guys said, "...is she married?"

I chuckled a little bit and said that she wasn't. Both stayed quiet for a little while. After about ten minutes, one of them, we'll call him "Michael," said, "Wouldn't it be funny if we went home and studied up on Canada to impress her with our knowledge of her home?"

We all laughed. I thought it was so funny that he had been thinking about her visit this whole time.

The other single fella, we'll call him "Neil," laughed and began a hypothetical conversation with my female colleague, who wasn't in the room.

"So," he said, "that election of 1873. It was crazy, wasn't it?"

Everyone in the room thought this was hilarious and we all started chiming in with hypothetical cheesy pick-up lines related to the US's northern neighbor. The men were rapid-firing with the jokes and we were all having a great laugh.

Keep in mind that our Thai house mate was also with us, and she doesn't speak much English. She was barely keeping up with our normal conversation, but she was being a good sport and laughing along at all the fake flirtation, even though she didn't really understand what was being said.

After a minute or so, Neil says in a lusty voice--still to my colleague who is not in the room--"So, ever been to Regina?" which is said with a long "i." It's a city in Alberta. It mean "queen" in Latin. It rhymes with a certain...female body part.

"...what did you say?!" the petite voice of our innocent Thai neighbor half whispered.

To borrow a phrase from my mother-in-law, we all died laughing! The expression on her face was so funny, and once we all realized what she thought Neil had said, it was even more hilarious.

I am definitely so thankful to have such good-humored and fun people around us all the time. It's nights like that one that have certainly made this move considerably more fun.

Vicariously yours,