Saving the world, one grocery bag at a time.

I've complained about our grocery shopping experiences over here. The grocery store is like a madhouse if we hit it at the wrong time. Our window of peaceful shopping opportunity is very short, so the Mister and I usually head to the store right after school to avoid the craziness. Because we're trying to eat healthier, we're eating more fresh produce. BUT because we live in Saudi Arabia, most of the produce is imported (thus expanding our carbon footprint even. more.). I have a theory that because the produce has to be flown in from Europe or farther, it's farther along in the decaying process than produce we can get at home. This means we're going to the grocery store on an almost daily basis because if we don't we're stuck with a kitchen full of rotten fruit that we didn't eat fast enough.

The annoying part of shopping almost every day is the number of plastic grocery bags we get as a result! The bag boys seem to have a 3 item limit per bag, and loaves of bread and cartons of eggs each get a plastic bag all their own!! There are times we'll go to the grocery store to get just 3 items and we'll come home with 5 plastic bags!! I don't even understand how that happens!

These are just from a couple months' worth of shopping! We have another half of a cabinet full of bags on the other side of the kitchen.

NOT anymore, though!! For Christmas, we got these fantastic reusable grocery bags!

Oh yes, that's Big Bird and Cookie Monster you see.

Nope, we don't have any children. But golly do we love these grocery bags! When we used them for the first time, the bag boy just laughed.

Then he was so confused because I was making him put ALL of our groceries in just TWO of our big ol' bags! Step aside, buddy. Let the crazy white lady take care of this.

I love my Sesame Street grocery bags. Not just because they're made of awesome, but because they're saving me from having to find somewhere else to put those stupid plastic bags!!

Vicariously yours,

Losing weight is hard to do over here!

It's the new year, which means it's time for more whiny blog posts from Amber about losing weight. Like many Americans, weight loss is a yearly resolution for me. I will say, however, that living here last year probably helped me get the closest to reaching that goal that I've ever gotten. It's amazing how easy it is to shed pounds when you don't have the extra calories of the work day happy hour!

The one big difficulty with dropping weight as an expat in Saudi Arabia is grocery shopping. I loathe grocery shopping here as it is, and once you add in the limitations on the trendy foods, I'm one cranky camper.

Here's an example.

I'm using the Self.com Jump Start diet as a guide for my caloric intake as well as my workouts. I've had success with the Self programs before, so I'm back for more. Plus even the Mister likes the recipes they work into the diet, so who can complain, right!?

This is what I would really liked to have had for breakfast this morning:

Here are the reasons why I couldn't have it for breakfast this morning:

• English muffins of any variety, much less the whole wheat kind, are impossible to find at our grocery store. Perhaps they're stocked at one of the other grocery stores that also caters to the American expats, but we're not willing to run around town patchworking our grocery list together. The traffic is a nightmare and it's even worse once you get inside the store.
• Almond butter? I'm not sure where I would find it in the stores at home! Sometimes the more obscure food items are miraculously stocked at my grocery store. But when I asked the clerk about almond butter the other day, he looked at me like I'd asked for the coordinates to the Orion Belt. Yes, he spoke English, smart alecks. Even after I described what almond butter was, he frowned and regretfully informed me that no such item had ever been on the store's inventory.

This is what I did have for breakfast this morning:

No, there's no Chobani here, but yogurt is definitely something Arabs do! And YAY, Self!! Za'atar is everywhere here, so I already had a giant shaker of it in my spice cabinet! Everyone knows about Middle Eastern cuisine's healthy relationship with chickpeas. I had no less than 6 varieties to choose from (none of them were no-salt-added, though). But even this meal presented a challenge.

Ironically, it's the pita that gives me trouble in this recipe. Oh, pitas we've got! But for some reason "whole wheat" seems to be a dirty word (phrase, really) over here. We can't find wheat bread or wheat pitas. It's funny because we can find something called "brown bread" in the bakery section...but that's just what it is. It's white bread that has had brown food coloring put in it. There are no grains involved in the brown bread. 

Perhaps Saudis work on the placebo diet...

I think it's so funny that I can find items such as this

the world's largest tub of Philadelphia cream cheese. Who needs this much cream cheese?!

and this

It's called "snake fruit." It has scales. I'm scared of it.

but I can't find wheat bread!!

Vicariously yours,

Every day's an apocalyptic stock-up day at the Saudi grocer.

Last night, the Mister and I were able to finally go grocery shopping. We divided the grocery list and conquered the Lulu.

Ok, that's a bit of an overstatement because NO BODY conquers the Lulu. No body.

As we were unpacking our groceries I made the comment to the hubsy that grocery shopping in the fully-developed world will be really bizarre once we arrive back in the States. I've become so Saudi-ized that I mow old ladies down, step over small children, push my way into lines and cut in between people's conversations like American me would never dream of doing at home! It's survival of the fittest in a Saudi grocery store. Kill or be killed.

The hubbins laughed and said, "You'll never have to act like that in a grocery store in the States because it's never that crowded." And he had a point.

To say that the typical Saudi grocery store is crowded doesn't quite do it justice. Unfortunately, I'm too timid to take photos or video inside the store. So let me try to describe it accurately:

You know the pre-snowstorm rush on the Krogers or Publix that inevitably happen as soon as the Southern weatherman announces a few inches of snow? It's like that. But more crowded, and with stocked shelves, and EVERY DAY.

For any readers who live in places that actually have winter, the pre-snowstorm rush is when everyone sends at least one family member out to the local Kroger (or grocery store of your choice) to get non-perishable items and the staples that would be needed should any of the following happen: power failure, getting snowed in, or school is cancelled (which means a house full of hungry kids). That means the bread and milk aisles are a wasteland, and the lines at the cashier lanes are miles long.

Now, take that scenario, but include EVERY member of the large Saudi, Indian, or Pakistani family, increase the grocery cart size, and feed the kids a truck load of sugar before they arrive and you've got a rough idea of what grocery shopping in Saudi Arabia is like. Every. day.

It's a massive test of my patience. It's a miracle I haven't snapped at any unruly children. Last night, as we were waiting to check out, the Mister tapped my shoulder and directed my attention at a little boy in too-large hand-me-down pants who was totally laid out, on his stomach, LICKING THE FLOOR and scrubbing the nasty tile grout with his finger nail.

American me would have gagged instantly.

Saudi me just rolled my eyes and sighed.

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!? I just rolled my eyes and sighed as everyone else stepped over or around the child.

Where was his mom? I dunno. American me would have told him to stop licking the disgusting grocery store floor and helped him find his mom. Saudi me just chuckles and taps her foot impatiently until it's her turn at the cashier counter.

I can only pray that these changes are easily reversible. Otherwise it's going to be a really awkward summer.

Vicariously yours,

Calories Shmalories. It doesn't matter in Saudi.

This country seems to be a land of contradictions. Women have to cover up to go in public, but television is rife with sexual messages. Education is "valued", but students don't come to school on the first day after a break because "nothing important happens." The country's government is spending money on "green construction," but the citizens litter and waste.

Another contradiction that's especially annoying to me at the moment is the fact that Saudis seem to be so concerned with weight, but there are no stinkin' nutrition labels ANYWHERE!

The Mister and I are trying to lose weight. After binging and bulging since our arrival in September, we've finally come to grips with the fact that we need to get serious about our health and drop a few pounds. That and the fact that we'll be spending a week this summer on the beach with the Mister's svelte brother and his supermodel-proportioned wife. If I said the intimidation factor wasn't playing a part in our desire to slim down, I'd be lying.

As I'm sure any wife can understand, I hate my husband's metabolism. All he has to do is sneeze with a little gusto and he drops 10 pounds. He's just been running and doing a little strength training since we returned from Berlin and he's already lost a few inches.

I, meanwhile, am going to be taking a whole-body approach and really monitor my caloric intake and try to vary my workouts so I can get the most benefit. As a woman in Saudi Arabia, I'm already discouraged.

Unless I'm buying items imported from the West, I cannot find nutritional information on any food items in the grocery store. I can't go for a run without wearing my abaya and hijab and let's be honest, that just ain't happening. Joining a gym is very expensive and very intimidating, from what I've heard (think high school locker room, but with overly oppressed women and NO men).

I'm so frustrated already, but I'm determined to at least get back to my pre-Saudi weight. Through cunning use of the Google and a little clever math, I've found some calorie calculators, and I'm ready to tackle this challenge.

Here's hoping!

Vicariously yours,

When did grocery shopping alone become such an ordeal

Before we went to Berlin, our car broke down. Normally this wouldn't be such an ordeal, but we live in Saudi Arabia, so we haven't gotten our car fixed yet. This means we're dependent on other people for our transportation. Normally this wouldn't be such an ordeal, but we live in Saudi Arabia, so nothing isn't an ordeal.

I'm not suggesting that people haven't been helpful. Our neighbor is giving us a ride to school everyday, and he hasn't complained once about how he always has to wait for us in the mornings. But since I've got such an odd schedule, not having a car has made things even more complicated. For example, today I stayed late because I have my PLC on Mondays. I caught a ride with a colleague that lives a few blocks away, thankfully. I cancelled my Arabic session on Sunday because I wasn't sure how I'd get home. Dangit, why I gotta be such a go-getter?!

Anyway, that's not the point of my story.

Because we just got back from Berlin, we were running pretty darn low on groceries. What's the point of going grocery shopping when you're just going to be out of town for a week, right? So we put the house mates on notice and asked them to let us tag along if they went to the store. The opportunity came tonight.

Well it just so happens that my healthy husband went for a run right before the ride pulled out of the station. I had two options: abandon ship and continue to eat green beans out of a can and frost bitten frozen strawberries, or take the risk and go to the grocery store with a man to whom I wasn't married.

I realize what a massive eye-roll that last sentence just caused for those students of mine that read this blog. I understand that it's not illegal for me to be in a car with a man that's not my husband. I realize that no one is probably taking the time to worry about who I ride to the grocery store with. But I know what I've been told by the other teachers at work and I've been advised against traveling without my husband.

So I was a little paranoid. I even sat in the backseat, Driving Miss Daisy style. As soon as we got to the store, we separated.

Perhaps the paranoia was showing on my face, because I felt like I was being watched the whole time I was wheeling my cart around. At one point I was trying to exit the produce section when a deep, Indian accented voice from behind said, "You're not supposed to be out without your guardian!"

My heart stopped. This was it. I should clarify that the grocery store we frequent is aimed at the Indian Subcontinent demographic, so the managers are all Indian or Pakistani. I was sure that one of the managers was going to ask to see my husband to make sure I wasn't breaking any unwritten rules.

It turned out that it was just a friend of ours from the Aramco camp. He is, in fact, Indian and he was just joking around with me. He had no idea what an ordeal and source of anxiety this simple trip to the grocery store was for me.

Vicariously yours,

We needed a little Christmas

You may think this update is late, but it's just been traveling on Saudi time. So in fact it's a little early.

Suckas.

This year, I was fully prepared for a Christmas filled with tears and homesickness, but for me that was not the case at all! (Moms, the Mister was longing for a tender Tennessee Christmas, so he missed ya'll enough for the both of us.)

I made an effort to incorporate some of our traditions from home so this holiday wouldn't feel so foreign, so--after a very late night run to the grocery store-- on Christmas Eve, I prepared the breakfast casserole. Technically, it was so late it was Christmas morning, but let's not split hairs.

No pork in the Kingdom = no pork sausage, so this is the lamb sausage I used for the breakfast casserole. I tried not to think of this image as I was eating the casserole on Christmas morning. It looked every bit like a skillet full of cat poop as this picture suggests.

I played the role of matriarch this year and got up before everyone else (all one of 'em) and put the breakfast in the oven. The breakfast casserole is a tradition my family started when we stopped going to my grandparents' house for Christmas morning. Other than the sausage, which was hard enough to locate, it's got some pretty easy-to-find ingredients. Eggs, bread, cheese and milk will pretty much be found in any grocery store anywhere in the world.

The hubbins had monkey bread every Christmas morning with his family, so I got to learn how to make monkey bread for the first time this year! In America, this wouldn't be such a difficult task...But we're not in America, now are we? I searched for the canned biscuits that are the actual bread of the monkey bread, but I couldn't find any. Thankfully, the Mister knows about the secret "American refrigerated stuff" aisle, and Christmas was saved! Other typically American items, not so easy to find.

Exhibit A:

This is not brown sugar. It's just sugar that is brown. Like the unrefined cane sugar. Shopping in the Kingdom is fun!

Exhibit B:

Couldn't find the cinnamon powder, so I had to make my own! This is remarkably easier than I ever thought it would be, but I certainly missed the convenience of just opening the cinnamon shaker. Especially while half awake in my pajamas on Christmas morning.

Exhibit C:

The monkey bread has to be cooked in a bundt pan or an angel food cake pan...both are foreign concepts here, apparently. So I had to get creative a make one of my own! We stuck a glass in the middle of our ikea saucepan and hoped for the best! (We wrapped it in aluminum foil in case the heat made it break. Can't have monkey bread with glass shrapnel, now can we?)

It all worked out in the end, and the hubs and I had a little familiarity on Christmas morning.

We invited the housemates over for Christmas breakfast and some games. We read the Christmas story, nommed on some faux sausage, and worked off the calories with a few rounds of Kinect.

It was a really great first Christmas abroad. We were surrounded by great people, and we got to Skype with our family several times. I look forward to making more Christmas traditions that are uniquely ours, as only living abroad can force you to do.

Vicariously yours,

P.S. We bought ourselves a little treat as a Christmas present:

Dr. Pepper is super expensive here, so we don't get to drink it very often!

I'm a little intimidated by the food here

If ever the Mister and I need a reminder that we are living in a foreign country, we just need to head to the grocery store. Granted, there are a lot of familiar objects like Ritz crackers and ramen noodles, but there are SO many new things, every time we go grocery shopping, it's like walking down the Silk Road with friggin' Marco Polo! There are spices I never knew existed, lots of new smells, and not a single Rice a Roni or Hamburger Helper in the whole joint!

We shop at a grocery store that caters more to the Indian/Bangladeshi/Filipino expats of Saudi Arabia rather than actual Saudis, so not everything we see is unique to Saudi Arabia. But boy is it still weird!

Case in point:

The purple mangosteen.

I spotted this freakish fruit in our first few trips to the grocery store, and I really wanted to buy it...but I was too intimidated. I didn't know if you peel it, boil it, juice it, or all three! I wasn't sure which parts were edible and/or tasty. So I just watched in envy as the Thai, Filipino and Indonesian grocery patrons snatched these bad boys up.

Then the newest addition to the English staff--who had lived in Indonesia for two years and enjoyed the mangosteen frequently--introduced me to the odd fruit.

As you can see, this fruit has very little in common with the mango. In fact, in all my extensive research (read: scanning the wikipedia article), I couldn't find any relationship between the mango and the mangosteen.

Anyway, you're probably wondering how you go about eating this bad boy. Lemme show you.

There's kind of a hard shell, which you punch through with your thumb.

Then you kinda dig down a little bit and pull the bright pink, juicy rind away from the fruit.

The white part is the edible part. It's in sections, like an albino mandarin orange encapsulated in a fleshy pink crust. It's really really juicy.

I kind of tastes like really highly concentrated mixed fruit Kool-Aid. It's very very sweet, so it's a good thing the edible part is so small.

So there you have it folks, a food item that I'd never experienced until coming to Saudi Arabia.

Vicariously yours,

in which "yeah, i live in saudi arabia...so?"

I have started about 5 or 6 posts in the last month or so but just haven't had the energy or desire to finish them. They are all very good...one about TV, one about doing everyday errands, etc. Amber has been encouraging me to "write a blog post or people will stop reading!" So to hold off your exodus, because I'm posting, already.

I think the biggest reason that I couldn't finish a post was because I don't think it's that exotic. I was totally stoked to write these big blog entries about all this stuff I'd been doing because it was all new to me. But I have now lived in Saudi for awhile now...and it's getting to be normal.

That's right. I'm starting to feel at home here in KSA. This is just where I live. Sure, every once in awhile I have that "oh crap, I'm in another country moment" but mostly the awe has really faded. I say this as I eat Poppadums ("An Indian Gourmet Snack Perfect for Today's International Lifestyle"...says so on the Pringles-esque tube) dipped in homemade hummus that I got at our grocery store, LuLu. It has been totally strange to sit and think about the stuff that is now the norm. I have always been amazed at how able to adapt humans are...but this is ridiculous.

Some examples:

1. I was awakened yesterday morning in that "woke up in the middle of a dream and have no idea what's going on" haze by the call to prayer. I literally rolled over and said out loud, "What IS that!?" Amber looked at me like I was crazy and said..."Ty...it's the Athan...you've heard it a million times..." A little later, I realized it wasn't that the actual call to prayer woke me up...it was because the muezzin was different. That means that I've grown so used to the way the other guy does the Athan that the new guy threw me off. WHAT!?

2. A couple of mornings ago, a car drove by me on the shoulder and missed my side mirror by MAYBE an inch. I didn't even blink. WHY AM I USED TO THAT!?

3. I have a shawarma guy, a barber, a computer repair guy, an oil change guy, a shiisha "bar", and a grocery store. These guys are the only guys I will go to for their respective errands. I am turning into an Alwahab.

And these are just a few things that I've noticed right off the top of my head.

I have my days where I don't like it here. I have my days where I am amazed that I live in a country like this. But most days I'm just going to work, getting on facebook...normal.

Before I left, my Dad and I were talking about living abroad as an adult. He said something like, "You'll go to the grocery store and it'll be really crazy...but after a month or so, it's just going to the grocery store." Well said, Dad. Well said...

...have I mentioned that my grocery store is covered in neon lights and adorned with two pyramids?

Vicariously yours,

Ya'll better be thankful, darnit!

As our American readers know, Thanksgiving is coming up. This is a holiday every American has grown up with, and each family has its own traditions that make this time of year special. Hollywood likes to satirize the drama that can sometimes come from having so much family together time, but being away from home during the holidays certainly makes one long for the days of family tension filling the air over the dinner table.

The hubs and I are hosting Thanksgiving for our colleagues. I've wanted to host Thanksgiving for years, but I've generally been overridden by family members with bigger houses and larger dining room tables. I'm really excited to finally get to have a house full of guests and yummy Thanksgiving aromas.

Well, hopefully my house will be filled with the usual aromas. See, some of the traditional American products are hard to find over here, making the typical dishes (read: dressing and green bean casserole) a lot harder to prepare than they should be.

A few of the things that are going to require a little extra searching: marshmallows (pork products are illegal, you know. google it.), celery, condensed soups (a la cream of mushroom and others), Jiffy corn bread mix, and any sort of cooking wine/sherry/alcohol at all.

Luckily, I don't think my guests will mind. All of the residents of the house are invited, including our Thai neighbor with mad skills in the kitchen. We're also inviting another family from down the street, and the matriarch is Mexican--tamales, anyone? Add to that our new boss and her billionaire husband, both Saudis, who have offered to bring a dish. I asked for the most authentically Saudi dish they could muster. It's going to be a very international Thanksgiving, and half the guests aren't going to miss the traditional dishes anyway.

While I might not be able to have the candied yams or the mashed potatoes with bacon bits, I'm pretty sure the first Thanksgiving I host around my table will be one for the personal history books.

Vicariously yours,

Grocery shopping. Alternative title: Oh hey! They have (insert brand name here)

The hubs and I went grocery shopping last night, as well as all kinds of other exploring--all thanks to our wonderful Bangladeshi driver Nour (whose name I'm sure I'm misspelling).

It was such a comforting experience because every aisle had familiar food items that we weren't expecting to find so far from home. For example, they have Progresso soup--and anyone who taught on the sixth grade team with me (Lee Shreeve) can testify to my undying love of all things Progresso. They also have those Hormel ComplEats meals, Lays potato chips, and Garnier Fructis hair products (which I use cause they're cheap).

The hilarious find of the night was this beauty:

I don't think we even still have this in the US anymore!

We were also surprised to find that things really cost just about the same as at home, with a few items costing maybe a dollar or two extra.

For example: My shampoo cost SR 14.95. That looks like a shocking number, but when you convert that to US$, it translates to $3.98. If memory serves me correctly, that's the exact same price I used to pay at home.

This is both a blessing and a curse. We exchanged all the money we had to Saudi Riyals before we left. What use did we have for US dollars? We didn't really have ALL that much money before we left, but we were under the assumption that because the exchange was in our favor, some things would be cheaper over here. Now that we know that everyday items are roughly the same cost, budgeting will be super easy...but we've still got about a week and a half before our first paycheck, and the Riyals are disappearing fast.

After we went to Carrefour (that's the name of the "grocery" store here. I use the quotations because it's really like a Sears meets a Wal-Mart meets a Kroger. EVERYTHING in one place!!), Nour was so kind to drive us out to Al-Khobar, the part of town where Hubsy and I will be living once our apartment is ready. Al-Khobar is at the end of the Bahrain bridge, and it's a really really nice part of town! There's all kinds of public art--I can't wait to get our own car so we can drive around and take pictures to show you guys. There are parks along the beaches--which I still haven't seen in the daytime. Insh'allah that will happen soon.

Nour went way above and beyond the call of duty, and he showed us the New Villas, the townhouses the school has purchased and is renovating for the new teachers. This is where the language barrier kicked in because I don't think he understood that we're actually going to be living in the new apartments which are somewhere near the new villas, but it was great nontheless to see our soon-to-be stomping grounds.

THE NEW VILLAS WERE SOOO BEAUTIFUL!! I wanted to take pictures, but they're not really where I'm going to be living, so I thought it would be silly. They have wonderful tile floors, great bedrooms and the kitchens are fantastic! If our new apartment is half as lovely I will be a happy girl.

Nour was so sweet to then drive us through what the Mister and I dubbed the Green Hills of Dammam. It's called the Golden Belt and Green Belt. I cannot even begin to describe to everyone how opulent and amazing these houses were!! Take the McMansions of Brentwood and multiply them by like 5 and you've got an idea of the sizes of these houses! We'll go back in the daytime and take pictures.

Anyway, now it's the weekend, and the Mister and I are kind of holed up in our hotel room just lesson planning, internet surfing and all around vegging out. We have no car, and Nour was out so late driving us around last night that we feel kind of bad calling him up to work on his weekend as well.

I think it goes without saying we're excited to move into our apartment and get our car so we can reclaim some of our freedom.

In the meantime, we remain

Vicariously yours,

p.s. I've been trying to post a recording of the evening call to prayer, but we can't find the cords the connect our video camera to the computer. So that little tidbit might have to wait until we get into the apartment and can really search through our stuff.